“It’s ONLY the Chandelier” they all say. What do they mean by ‘ONLY’, that’s me they are talking about. And it’s not really my fault. when I rattle it’s the kids jumping upstairs, probably on the bed. Or one of those pesky lights burn out.
Life as a chandelier isn’t always bright. It’s only twice a year when I get any kind of care, Just before Thanksgiving and about a months later just before Christmas. The rest of the year I gather cobwebs, dust and the gunk that settles on me from the vapors that come from the kitchen. Most of the time that amounts to grease and oil fumes, boy do my people fry a lot with out a lid on the frying pan. Sure the smells are almost heavenly when the food is cooking, but bacon every morning almost makes me gag.
Cleaning day is nice, even only twice a year. My dangles come off, that makes me feel light for a while. They go into a warm soapy dish pan and come out sparkling. While that’s happening I get dusted, and maybe some of the grime get mopped off. My age is showing, though. After many years my protective coating is gone and repeatedly wiping had caused my shiny metal to tarnish and darken. It’s not even so I look like a well used stuffed leopard – no real spots, just the hints of what used once was.
And then it comes to my lights. I have those frosted “hurricane light” type globes. They say that it’s impossible to find replacements for broken ones just like mine. The Borg only carries something close, and way too expensive to replace all of them at once just to keep them all the same. Now that I think about it, I can understand why all anyone can say is “It’s just the chandelier!”